Marriage Proposals to Date: 95...ish

Market days are always fun/interesting to say the least. Because my market is such a small one, I normally have to travel the larger one in Zabre, a neighboring village. And since only a small portion of the population speaks French, it is always quite difficult to find certain items. When I got to site I was so excited that I could cook for myself that I was bound and determined to find eggs so that I could make a veggie omelet. For the first couple of weeks, every time I went to Zabre I kept forgetting to learn the Bissa word for . Hence, a very fun game of charades would ensue. For example, I would ask someone where I could find eggs and they would either look at me with a blank stare or motion over to someone to help translate. When that did not work, I would put my hands under my armpits and bob my head and kind of walk like a chicken. Afterwards, I would then attempt to crack open an imaginary egg, point at it, and “try” to explain that was what I was looking for (in “Franglisa”=Francais+Bissa). After a few times of making a fool of my self, I thought I would try to limit my social awkwardness/ embarrassing myself and make a cheat sheet of popular words. Turns out, there is a season for eggs, and outside of this season it is nearly impossible to find eggs outside of the big cities. Hard to imagine there is a season for egg laying but there is. So I will just have to wait another five months for eggs. On market days, besides planning on making a fool of myself in that respect, I can always count on multiple marriage proposals. This comes from both drunk and sober men. Here, market days are huge dolo drinking days. Men, young and old, insist on proposing to me multiple times even after I tell them, "No thank-you. Have a nice day." If they keep asking, I usually say, "look, I already have four husbands and to take on another husband would be too many men to support. So no, I cannot marry you." I have gotten pretty good at saying this. They are usually, normally confused because in Burkina polygamy is only allowed for males. Sometimes, before I have a chance to walk away, some might say, "You mean you have four children?" to which I respond, "No, I meant four husbands." Then, I try to make a quick exit. I think it is quite funny that about 98 percent of my marriage proposals come from me who do not know me. They usually meet me on the street and after saying hello, they ask for my hand in marriage. If only dating in the States was this easy! However, while they are asking me, I always think to myself....”hmmmm, I could be this nagging, clingy, back-stabbing, cheating, manipulative, and lazy wife and they would have no idea what they were getting themselves into”(for those who do not know me, I am not these things, btw). I know I have an dazzling personality, but not enough for someone to propose to me after three seconds of conversation. When they see me, I think they just see green.... Green for money. Green for green card.