A Couple of Interesting Interactions w/ My Friend's Family

My friend’s two daughters (ages 4 and 6) always tell me they want their mom to find them skin lightening cream so they can have white skin like mine. It breaks my heart when I hear them telling me this. In response I tell them that their ebony skin is so beautiful as it is and that my skin color is so boring. Upon hearing this the girls adamantely shake their heads and say that that is not true and that they still want white skin.

A few few weeks ago as I was waiting for my friend to finish preparing dinner I crossed my legs to get more comfortable in my seat. Seeing me do this her 4 year old daughter imitated me by crossing her legs as well. Masse, her mom, saw her do this and commented on it. I think to myself, “Oh, that is so sweet. She is copying me.” Masse then asks me if I know that crossing my legs when I sit is a totem (Burkinabé word for something that is strictly forbidden). She tells me that when I cross my legs it means my mom is going to die. I think to myself, “So basically I have been offending everyone since my arrival to Burkina. I was surprised this was the first time I had heard about it. I knew there were certain ways Burkinabé don’t sit e.g. Indian style because they consider it improper but I did not think it was a totem.” I was like okay even though sitting with my legs crossed is a like second nature to me I will try not to offend her and her family ( I doubt they would care though) and find a new position to sit. So I uncross my legs, rest my elbows on my knees, and rest my chin in my palms. I think to myself, “Good. This is a comfortable position. Probably won’t offend anyone.” Upon seeing this my friend tells me, “You know, that position is also forbidden. When you sit like that it means your dad is going to die.” I could not help but laugh because there must be so many gestures, movements, positions, that I do that are forbidden/improper here. I must be offending everybody! I know that the locals do not care how I sit or move; I think they just figure I am ignorant and let it slide.